# SORRYNOTSORRY .

ONE . wendy lynn testaburger was born on the 18th of december in denver, colorado. her parents — an urban planner and an orthodontist — bestowed her with as much pressure & responsibility as they did love & support. wendy's early-onset altruism has compelled her since the dawn of her ability to reason to devote her time to the betterment of the lives of her peers, her community, and society; a drive which, more frequently than she cares to admit, conflicts with her fervor for competition. wendy studied law and political science at an ivy league school, and will be mastering in climate & environmental law.TWO . there is no such thing as overachieving to wendy testaburger. subsequent to her tenure as student body president in elementary (a position from which she was summarily usurped), wendy's high school extracurriculars were extensive & diverse. in between volleyball, journalism, and track, wendy sat model UN & debate (captain & vice captain, respectively). after regaining control of the student council, her repertoire expanded to include yearbook committee, GSA, and SAT prep tutoring. wendy went on to deliver the valedictory — but not without fronting the cost of the burnout.THREE . gifted child syndrome fall-out: self care edition . as much as wendy professes that she looks after herself by eating well, exercising, and seeing a therapist, she undercuts such efforts with a horrendous sleep schedule and the occasional stress cigarette. she justifies this by comparing these incidental tendencies to the devastating consequences of an unprescribed adderall addiction in high school.

#speedread.

FOUR . while wendy thrives on interpersonal contact and attempts to maintain prodigious networks of friends, she struggles in romantic relationships. dogged not so much with commitment issues as she is the overwhelming fear of failing at commitment, wendy's reservations regarding falling in love are primarily informed by the supernova-level collapse of her one big relationship (which she may or may not have reconciled internally). she dates infrequently and with trepidation, often chickening out for fear of having her heart broken over another important connection deteriorating.

FOUR CONT. despite this, wendy is an exceptionally devoted partner — and friend. she places her personal relationships in high esteem, and is fiercely protective and loyal — sometimes to a fault. her possessiveness knows no bounds, and irrational jealousy will often get the better of wendy when her heart is on the line. there is very little she would not do for anyone she loves, for better or worse; love is one of very few things that may compel wendy to breach the constraints of her otherwise sterling moral code. wendy plays to win, in all things: she will not see the demise of a relationship without firing on all cylinders for its longevity.

FIVE . despite her amiable, compassionate, and generally giving nature, wendy has a loose bridle on her more condemning qualities. she entrusts near-all of her self worth into her academic performance; minor slips in her grades are not an option, and phoning it in is sacrilegious. when second place is tantamount to total failure, wendy is beholden to the weight of the world; she can be driven to cutthroat competitiveness, and even outright cruelty, to maintain control. while she isn't confrontational, wendy is incredibly reactionary — and has no qualms delivering a smackdown when she feels it's the only way to underscore a point. don't fuck with wendy testaburger.SIX . speaking of crippling insecurities — wendy is incredibly sensitive to criticism regarding her physical appearance. her relationship with her body is almost as awful now as it was when she was a child; the psychological — and physical — scars of the societal pressure to be perceived as more conventionally attractive never completely faded. by no means does wendy believe herself unattractive, ostensibly; she is just sober to the reality of her intellect simply not being enough for others to pay her any mind. wendy dresses and presents herself against instinct in professional spaces, and remains rather buttoned-up for the sanctity of her mental health in any other circumstance.CREDITS .
front page carrd image by diobelle cerna.
twitter pfp by saltymeat.
i color & compose everything else myself. graphic design is my passion.
the fc i never use is mikey madison.this carrd was created by jaynedits !

❝ BEBE STEVENS.

❝ the best friend. despite the tumult of a shared upbringing in redneck hell, as well as the added stressors of geographical separation, bebe maintains her spot at the top of wendy's list of trusted friends. they've grown apart in light of a divergence in personal circumstances, but tending to the health of their ongoing relationship is just about the only thing wendy will roll back into town for.

❝ CRAIG TUCKER.

❝ gaslight, gatekeep, guineagod. the fact of the matter is, worthy chess opponents are a dime a dozen; worthy chess opponents who would unquestionably be your best choice of backup in a physical altercation? unheard of. the friendship that no one expected, that everyone questions, and yet somehow eventuates in low impact empathy without expectation. it just works. oh, but they're both SO hard to get along with, right?

❝ KYLE BROFLOVSKI.

❝ an odd dynamic. kyle might be the only person that wendy truly & wholeheartedly trusts. their interests ran parallel all their lives, and yet their friendship is something that thrived by the end of high school and into early adulthood. intellectual equals, soon-to-be roommates and former platonic prom dates: it's unspeakably cathartic to commiserate in someone else who thought themselves to be alone at the top.

❝ ERIC CARTMAN.

❝ girl, idk what to tell you, even. but i would probably direct you towards a select-few bleachers songs that serve the express purpose of me keeping my cards so close to my chest on this one. when 99.9% of one's interactions with a person serve the narrative of one's unbridled & unyielding hatred, why does one tolerate their shit? it's anyone's guess, at this stage. take a shot, and you'd be right. watch this space.

❝ HEIDI TURNER.

❝ really working on it. heidi hasn't had the best experience among her peers, and wendy is completely aware that she was complicit in perpetuating heidi's misery. they are friends regardless, and (in spite of a brief & unlabeled fling in junior year,) routinely engage in a cordial, if stilted engagement. wendy, perhaps a little guilty for playing second fiddle to the alpha bitch, is diligent in mending this connection. but like. with boundaries.

❝ SAL FISHER.

❝ go to therapy. some women are just a magnet for emotionally vulnerable, insecure people! though sal's remarks upon their life experiences are not held by wendy in any strong regard of verisimilitude, he's nice enough. prone to soberly deep conversations at hours unknown to man, it's just validating to be spoken to as if you're the only sane person on earth. a solid, albeit unconventional friendship.

❝ RULES . to keep this brief, i maintain a strictly no minors policy on my account. i don't make a habit of posting anything especially egregious, objectionable, or inappropriate — that said, i'm an adult. i simply prefer not to hang out with minors. i don't do it irl, and i don't do it online.i do not post anything graphic or sexually explicit. the twitter circle is used like a close friends story (ic), and is opt-in only. if you'd like circle access, like this tweet. whether i do so is at my discretion.it goes without saying that i will not use pejorative language that i may not claim, and expect the same from you. character drama is fine, contentions between writers should be dealt with like grown-ups. i will block parties involved in nasty behavior.

❝ SHIPPING . i'm somewhat open to it. my only ask is that a) there's chemistry, and b) we've had a discussion about it, or we at least talk to each other on the reg. please don't attempt to strong-arm me into a ship; you're gonna have a bad time. i prefer a single ship timeline, as i use the twitter account as a twitter account, but i'm open to variety elsewhere.

❝ MAINS . kind of do, kind of don't. i tend to enjoy writing with people i know well, and might refer to specific iterations of a character that i enjoy. i am by no means exclusive, but i do consider myself selective. the section above is just people i interact with regularly.

❝ LINKS . your hall pass for me to ping you ic any-time, and vice versa, is here.
i occasionally dump headcanons and useless information here.
spotify playlist. pin board.❝ ABOUT ME . my name is ellie! she / her, australian. i've clocked a few years as wendy across a couple of platforms, and this has thoroughly become a beast i cannot control. standard disclaimer that i very much am not my character, i just like her a whole lot.i don't write lit on main, as i find the twitter interface super awkward for longform; if you're interested in that, though, shoot me a dm!